Listen to Steventhen Holland and Jacob Barr talk about Steventhen’s amazaing story of life – Broken But Dead.
Summary
This is Jacob Barr, and in a recent episode of the Pro-Life Team Podcast, I had an insightful conversation with Steventhen Holland, a worship leader, singer-songwriter, author, speaker, national pro-life speaker, and the founder of Broken Not Dead Ministries. We delved into the power of personal stories in promoting healing and encouragement, particularly in the pro-life context.
Steventhen’s journey is a testament to resilience and faith. Despite being conceived in harrowing circumstances, his mother chose life for him, an act he regards as heroic. His story challenges commonly held views about abortion, particularly in cases of rape, highlighting the inherent value and potential of every life, regardless of its beginnings.
Our discussion also touched upon the importance of vulnerability and authenticity in sharing personal stories. Steventhen’s ministry, Broken Not Dead, provides a platform for individuals to share their experiences of brokenness and healing. These stories serve as a source of inspiration and hope, illustrating how God can use our struggles for greater purposes.
Reflecting on God’s guidance in our lives, we discussed how trust in God’s timing and provision is crucial, especially in the realm of pro-life advocacy. Steventhen’s journey from a youth pastor to a national pro-life speaker is a testament to God’s providence and the power of a story to inspire change and bring hope.
Overall, our conversation underscored the significant role personal narratives play in the pro-life movement, offering unique perspectives that resonate deeply with others and foster a greater understanding of the sanctity of life.
#Hashtags: #ProLifeJourney, #HealingThroughStories, #VulnerabilityAndHope, #GodsGuidance, #SanctityOfLife, #PersonalTestimonies, #FaithInAction, #BrokenNotDead, #LifeAffirmingStories, #ResilienceAndFaith, #ProLifeAdvocacy, #SteventhenHolland.
Transcript
The transcript was automatically generated and may contain errors.
Jacob Barr :
Welcome to the pro-life Team Podcast i’m Jacob Barr and I’m here with Steventhen and we’re going to be talking about stories, people’s stories of vulnerability and authenticity, People who are sharing their brokenness in order to help show how they found healing and then provide encouragement for others to do the same. So, Steven Thin, I am so excited to have you on here and to hear some of your ideas and thoughts in the pro-life world. Would you introduce yourself as if you were talking to a small group of executive directors and pro?
Steventhen Holland :
Life friends? Sure, I’d love to. My name is Steventhen Holland. I’m a worship leader, singer-songwriter author, speaker, national pro-life speaker, and the founder of Broken Not Dead Ministries.
Jacob Barr :
Awesome and so tell us like, what does that mean to be So sounds like you’re helping people raise money and funds at different events is like they’re as the speaker who’s attracting, you know, helping attract people to attend is that what that looks like?
Steventhen Holland :
Yeah, well, it’s a blessing i get to share my story. Honestly, it’s a beautiful thing i never thought I’d be doing this, you know, with my life. I was a youth pastor and a worship leader for a lot of years, kind of in the church world. And I was pro-life but I didn’t realize that my story mattered in, you know in the pro-life movement so the doors that guys opened and opened up recently, over the last four years or so, I’ve actually been keynote speakers for a lot of pregnancy centering, fundraiser and banquets. Gala’s it’s been, I think I had 27 last year and I’ve got 30, a little over 30 booked this year. So it’s been a blessing really to show up, share my story and you know that which is beautiful but the icing on the cake as I get to raise a bunch of money for organizations that I believe in and literally are fighting on the front lines for life, and it’s an honor to be a part of it.
Jacob Barr :
Awesome. So one, some of the things that we like to do on this podcast is one we like to highlight some of God’s fingerprints. So as you reflect, have you, as you, as you have reflected on your story, where have you seen God’s fingerprints in your pro-life story?
Steventhen Holland :
Wow that’s a that’s a great question. I think God’s fingerprints, handprints hugs around me have been have been evident through my whole life you know, as I think back, i mean, I had AI had a mentally challenged mother that was gang raped by 5 men. She was in a mental institution. You know, literally everyone in her life was pressuring her to abort me. But God, right. But God had a bigger plan she literally carried me homeless, fought for me, chose life for me. And you know, when I think back to that, you know, it’s as I’ve gotten older in life i’m 40 years old and you know for most of society they would look at my life and say there’s no way that this guy should be here. You know, even on the in the pro-choice side of things like statistically, you know, I should have been one that you know in their minds could be justified to end my life. But God, you know had a plan for me and I see it but even outside of that like my mom choosing life for me and there’s a 16 year old boy that actually found her behind this grocery store she was living in a box and God brought him by that day right to find her there nine months pregnant you know got us to their home they cared for us, you know and then that same 6 year old boy a week later I was on the same bottle of format I left the hospital with on Desk’s doorstep and he loaded us up and took us to Human Services to save my life. Yet God again right intervening. He, I mean the fact that a 16 year old boy even would think of that, you know And then I had an adopted family they were, they were my foster family at seven days old that squeezed milk into my mouth and loved on me and cared for me and then adopted me at age 2. You know, i again, all God, in my opinion, you know, he orchestrated all these things so I could keep going but you know, I want to. I want you to ask some questions.
Jacob Barr :
Well that’s a really rich answer like that is it’s got so much it just it speaks to you know like you know when the when the opposition or when the you know the abortion promoting arguments come out saying you know in case of rape you know abortion needs to be made available and your life is a shining example of why while life needs to be you know the needs to be brought to the forefront versus the just you know the you know they always promote like the hardships of life as being a reason to snuff out life How did what are your what is your response when someone you know when they when you hear that common that you know that those arguments for you know abortion in the case of rape like what? How do you what how do you look at that situation?
Steventhen Holland :
I’m thankful I’m here that somebody saw value and worth in my life and that somebody actually happens to be, you know, at the time was an 18 year old on the outside, but mentally she was only an 11 year old child. You know that that’s even at 46 when I actually found my birth mom, she was still an 11 year old mentally. So to, you know, when I get a chance to speak, you know, my heart is if an 11 year old child, the mental capacity of an 11 year old child saw the value of life, kind of like what’s our excuse, you know? But I think that, you know, people ask me a lot like, you know, how do you battle this how do you fight this? And I think my response is I have to continue to share my story. You know, like the uniqueness of me is I have a story to share. You know, coming from where I came from and you know, how I got brought into the world and really, you know, for somebody to look at me and say, well, you know, your, the circumstances that you were brought into this world devalues your life. You know, I mean, like, I have purpose, brother. You know what I’m saying like my wife of 15 years that I love my three beautiful girls, Isabella, Eliana and Cadence like they’re, you know, they have a dad and they wouldn’t be here if it wasn’t for my hero, you know, my mom fighting for my life and seeing value and worth in me despite the circumstances. Right and I and I think, honestly, I think that’s I’m trying not to sound conceited. I don’t think it’ll come off that way but I just for people to hear my heart, like that’s part of my purpose on this planet that I believe right now, right that I that’s how strongly I feel about my testimony. And you know, we say for such a time as this, you know, I have to share my story, you know, because people have to understand that, you know, I’m nobody special i mean, I’m a child of God, and he’s created me for a purpose but I’m supposed to be here for this moment, you know, to be a voice. And I’m thankful I have one.
Jacob Barr :
Yeah, well that in your voice is one that is so important because so many, well so many people in similar situations, their voice didn’t get to be heard and so your voice is needed to be heard a thousand times more than the typical person’s voice because people all in, you know, in this situation, you know, if you know with so many people using this as a reason for killing or for abortion, your voice is, you know, needs to speak loud in order to for people to hear it because a lot of people didn’t make it, you know, through, you know, abortion with the, you know, with abortion being so, you know, used in so many different scenarios. So have you heard, How would you describe what you’ve heard from God, whether it be through prayer or through God’s word, when it comes to the value of your life or people you know who have gone through, what you’ve gone through? Like what how would you describe what you’ve heard from God when it comes to, yeah, the value of your life and other’s lives?
Steventhen Holland :
Well, honestly, I think the best way to answer that is one of the reasons that I keep going and keep sharing not only what I mentioned before, you know, but I’ve seen how being vulnerable, like being obedient to what God’s called me to do, how that’s impacted other people’s lives. I you know, I kind of live by these three ES like when I share my story no matter what setting because I don’t just speak just in pro-life settings, you know, I do a lot of church ministry. I’m getting ready to go to a camp in Kentucky to lead worship for middle schoolers next week, you know, and it but every opportunity, whether it’s through song, like song, is very important to me. I’m a songwriter, so I’ve written 20 songs, recorded those. And I’ve had people like, man, you know, I’ve been battling cancer and your songs have like, it’s been my battle cry i listen to you every day, you know like those songs wouldn’t be there if it wasn’t for me having life, you know and I think about just really what I’m trying to say is how my story has impacted other people. You know like I don’t lead worship because I think I’m an amazing singer and all these things i lead worship and continue to do it because I’ve seen how being faithful to lead worship can impact and draw people into the person of Christ. And it’s the same thing with my testimony, right revelation says we overcome by the blood of the lamb and the word of our testimonies. And I’ve seen how me being faithful and obedient to share mine has allowed other people to overcome and I was going to mention the three ES and I fell off but to educate, to empower and to encourage, right. I think all three of those things happen in me, you know, being faithful again, to share my story and I think that’s why I kind of keep going i mean that gives me value, right like I’m valuable, hopefully to somebody if it if it can add value, add education, add empowerment, encourage one person, just one, it’s worth it. And even though I get to go and raise money for these beautiful life affirming and saving organizations, I think my favorite part is I have i’ve authored a book, you know, and I have a book table a lot of times set up at those events. And I’ll have people come up to me and I’m there two hours sometimes after an event and guess what’s happening? Ministry’s happening. You know, somebody’s been impacted by something I said and I would have never thought, you know, I’m here to raise money for an organization but all of a sudden this person’s found worth, found healing, you know, they’re struggling with because a lot of mine was like, I’m asking God, why God, why did this have to happen to me why am I the wrong color growing up in a white home in the South, you know, and just it’s relatable, you know, and it never ceases to amaze me how God can just be faithful to use our stories, you know, so.
Jacob Barr :
How would you compare working with pregnancy clinics to working with churches like when it comes to using the same, you know, gifts and talents, you know how does, how do they get applied to one versus the other and you know, what are the what areas do you see there that are the same or common between those two, you know, pregnancy clinics and churches And then what do you see that might be different?
Steventhen Holland :
Oh, that’s a great question. I think the same obviously a lot of organizations, you know in the pro-life world I’m working with are, you know, most of them are faith-based So obviously that common inator, common denominator is always Jesus, right. So if we can just stay there, we’re good, right? But I think.
Jacob Barr :
Combinator sounds like a pretty fun word I like.
Steventhen Holland :
We should, maybe we should, I don’t know, write a book or something. Yes, exactly coin that. But yeah, so I, you know, just, I think, you know, with Church world, you know, it’s always that it’s that taboo. Is that the right word to use? You know, like abortion, like, man, you know, like, I don’t mind for you sharing your story, like your testimony, but we don’t need to go too political, you know, like having those guardrails, which I’m like, you know, and I think that’s kind of our battle that, you know, man, the church has got to step up. You know, that this is more than just a story, You know, like it, like the church needs to. And I love the church there’s beauty in the church, but there’s also flaws and brokenness in the church and you know I think if we can’t stand for life, man, what can we stand for? You know. So I think that’s, you know the again the combinator, the common denominator is Jesus right. And I mean that’s the true source of hope like that’s and I and I and I I’m so encouraged, you know with a lot of pro-life you know pregnancy center organizations that they point people their clients to that true source of hope. But again I think some of the struggle would be and I get to use worship a lot of times you know, I’ve got a lot of pregnancy centers here recently, some pro-life organizations, even foster care adoption that are, you know, utilizing me to come in and do some worship nights, you know, some kind of being creative to. It may not be just a fundraising event, but it’s planting seeds in the community by using music that may draw a different crowd in to learn more about, you know, awareness and planting seeds for their organization in the event so i’ve loved that. Just kind of thinking outside the box i mean, I’ve been able to incorporate my musical talent, whatever, you know, into the fundraising event itself.
Jacob Barr :
Oh cool, so during the fundraising event, it turns into a bit. It also turns into a worship time as well.
Steventhen Holland :
Yeah, sometimes i tell some organizations, though, I’m like, OK, if you’re wanting me to come and keynote and speak, I can’t do a full worship concert, but I do. I do sing. There’s a couple of songs, especially a couple songs I’ve written that specifically pertain to my story, that kind of help enhance that. So I’ll actually incorporate you know worship music into my testimony. But yeah, so but I again, the challenge is made just with the church is churches will love for me to come and share my story, my testimony but you know i get handcuffed a little bit i mean, I hate to say it that way, but just don’t get too, I guess the words political on that side, right?
Jacob Barr :
Yeah, it seems.
Steventhen Holland :
Unless it’s a saint. To Human Life Sunday, you know, Oh.
Jacob Barr :
Ok, yeah it seems like when it comes to churches talking about abortion, I feel like they want, they want to invite people to come in who’ve had an abortion or they may not they may be pro-choice and they don’t want to have that be a roadblock to them coming and joining that church community. However, at the same time, I feel like that’s, you know, it’s part of, like it’s part of our core when it comes to, you know, as a believer in Jesus is that, you know, speaking up for the unborn and the value of life. And yeah, it just seems like so on one hand, it’s being treated like a roadblock to letting certain people experience and taste that church community, but on the other hand, it’s we’re not standing up for one of our core beliefs. And.
Steventhen Holland :
Yeah and I think that’s one, you know, on the flip side, that’s one reason why I have, you know, churches that bring me in to be kind of a soft approach, you know, because the reality is my story, you know it it’s going to challenge people. I hope. I hope it does i mean that’s my prayer and I mean I’ve had, i’ve had a, you know, they’ll go nameless but I had a young lady come up to me and say at a banquet actually a fundraising banquet for a pro-life organization. They said, you know my whole small group came here tonight you know, really we came to hear your story because we’ve been in a debate on, you know, and most of us came tonight kind of like, well, we’re, you know, we’re pro-life but with incest and rape you know, we could, you know, maybe be OK with that. And that’s where they came but then after I shared my story, she actually came up to me in tears and she said, and she confessed that we came here kind of, you know, thinking it was OK, you know, in those circumstances but after hearing your story, like, you know, we’ve been what’s the word i’m looking convicted, you know that our stance may not be right. And I and i think that there’s pasture sometimes that bring me in, you know, just to try to ruffle some, you know, to combat that without having to go right to it from the pulpit. Does that make sense what I’m saying?
Jacob Barr :
Oh, that makes. Yeah, makes perfect sense. And also I feel like your story is taking on the most difficult part. You know, the part that people will often will shrug off is like let’s focus on the main, you know, out of convenience people are choosing abortion and how that’s wrong and avoiding the, you know, the 1 % or less than 1 % when it comes to abortion because of rape and incest. And there was a oh boy, i was watching YouTube and there’s this one person that was saying something to the effect of you know, when it when it comes to someone being raped. You know, we should, you know, instead of giving the death penalty to the child who is innocent, we should be giving that consequence and penalty to the rapist and or better, you know, or you know, the rapist, you know, maybe they’re whatever they might have should be used for child support. That’s something that I’ve been thinking about but yeah, essentially they’re they should be receiving the consequence and the punishment, not the child who is, who is, who is, you know, being created during this time. What are your thoughts on the punishment for a rapist like I know that’s, you know how do you look at that when it comes to like what do you think would be the way to respond to that scenario?
Steventhen Holland :
Well, I think we all have our opinions, you know, and you know, no matter how I answer this question, it’s going to be, well, you know, there’s going to be on both sides but I think the best way I can answer it is just, you know, being real and fresh to me is I’ve had people ask me even be upset at times like, you know, well, you know, do they ever capture the men that did that to your mom? You know do you know who your father is and I don’t. I’ve had, I didn’t know my race or ethnicity. I still don’t know any medical history and I’m 40 years old. I didn’t know my race until I was 35 south five years ago i had a pastor friend of mine actually for Christmas. A purchase of dnatestslikeancestry.com type thing. So I did. I did that and you know now I could probably take that DNA testing at least sample you know a sample and go deeper you know pay a bunch of money and do all that. But man, my God has so like restored. You know in my opinion he, you know he’s taking what something you know the devil the that was meant for evil and turned it for his good and for me personal it’s a personal story, right. I don’t have to have. I’ve come to peace with that and I don’t have to have those answers so for me, you know people are like, well, don’t you want justice for your mom. And I feel like God has honored, honored that situation and I think that, you know I’m a firm believer that God, the punishment that those people need he’s going to bring it swift if he hasn’t already. You know if that’s the best way I can answer that, it’s this was this was if I’m being honest it’s a hard one for me.
Jacob Barr :
You know, this is a hard one.
Steventhen Holland :
Personally, I don’t want to i don’t want to pick it up. No, I just, I mean, i don’t have any desire to dig that up for me personally, right. I know I’m not trying to skate the question because you asked me, you know, in my flesh. I want them handled. You know what I’m saying? And I know in my flesh as a man I don’t know what I would do if I came to face with, you know, face to face with the rapist and my father you know what I’m saying i don’t know i can’t answer that. I hope that you know i firmly believe that no one is outside of God restoring you know and bringing healing and all those things too you know i think we overcome by love, you know, and God I mean, I’ve seen God i have a ministry called broken not dead, brother you know what I’m saying like even the broke, the broken of the broke, you know, I believe can find hope and healing and you know you’re not dead yet till you’re gone, you know till the heart stops beating and all that so I don’t know i hope that they would find Jesus, man. That’s my hope. I hope that whoever they were, whoever my father was, I hope he came to know the Lord, Hope he’s repented of his ways and God’s restored it, That that’s my. I guess that’s my honest answer.
Jacob Barr :
Yeah, finding Jesus can restore and heal even the most difficult and terrible situations.
Steventhen Holland :
That’s hard to say, you know, I mean, because I mean it’s, you know, you raped my mom, you know, my hero but you know God is again, you know he’s and this somebody i mean I used to say like I’ll be on, I used to say man, if I could trade places, whether I would have done it in a heartbeat. But then I started thinking about that, right. I mean God orchestrated even he allowed that evil to happen but then you know look at what he’s been able to do through that and I’m not saying it was fair i’m not saying I wish that she had to go through it, but the reality is that evil has happened but then look at what God’s doing i mean, I’m sitting here talking to you, sharing my story. You know, I wouldn’t even be on this platform if it wouldn’t have been for what had happened. So tell.
Jacob Barr :
Me more about broken not dead. But tell me, what’s the what’s the what’s the mission or what do you what’s that Ministry built for?
Steventhen Holland :
Well, where it is today, you know, I think ministry kind of evolves and you know as you go with what God’s calling you to do, we’ve literally created a platform for broken people to share their stories. So our mission is to bring hope and restoration to broken people. So we actually have a YouTube platform. We film, we do four film sessions a year, two in the fall, 2 in the spring. We film 10 people, produce the stories and we release them out on our YouTube platform. And then we also collaborate with other organizations, like a pregnancy Center for example, to host broken not dead events. So we use music and story to bring hope to broken people in a community. That’s the. That’s the short version.
Jacob Barr :
So the stories. The stories of what like what who? Who’s a candidate for being someone that what might be a story, You know, that would be included?
Steventhen Holland :
Anybody that’s been broken, brother, i mean it’s literally, I mean what God’s put on my heart and kind of the vision behind it And then the, you know as God’s brought people into the fold it’s we’re kind of creating a buffet. You know, like YouTube you can create playlists and all these things so at first it started with, hey, we just want to create a platform for people to share their story, right. And then when they share that brings hope and can restore some things to broken people as they’re watching. But now what, you know, something I didn’t really foresee happening is this is a free resource because we have donors that you know, invest and pay for the production. It’s a free resource to organizations. So I’ve got pastures now that are, you know, that are showing these videos of sermon illustrations. We have pregnancy centers, you know, that. Let’s say they have a client that comes in that’s dealing with cancer as well as an unplanned pregnancy. Well, we have stories of people that overcome cancer, you know, like suicide, depression, you know, marriage, relationship struggles. So, you know, we’re creating kind of topical stories, you know, just as God brings them to us so some of them I’ve met through my travels, you know, across the country. We’re actually getting ready to shoot season four. We’ve done three seasons of 10 stories each season in September and this season I so far, I’ve got three people flying in from Florida. I’ve got one flying in from Ohio we have another flying in from Texas. Those are all places that God’s allowed me to speak in and you know I’ve connected with people and they asked the same question you did what what’s this broken not dead stuff about, right. I’m like, hey, well, you know we create this platform for people to share their stories like, could I share or I know somebody that really needs to share. I had a pregnancy center that said, we’ve been praying for a platform for a couple of our ladies to share their stories because, you know, they just need to be told. And I’m like, well, hey, you know, we have this beautiful platform we’d love to share. So yeah, it’s.
Jacob Barr :
When it comes to these stories needing to be told, what part of their story would you say like so are you capturing let me, let me back up so are you capturing like where God worked through their story or how would you phrase the need for it to be captured and shared?
Steventhen Holland :
Yeah, well, and I think you know one and I think I know what you’re at like so we obviously God has to be, you know that would be a prerequisite with the God has to be part of the story. Now here’s the thing it may not be. They may be struggling to trust God, right in this moment they may be walking through that brokenness and whatever that is in their life so like, we have an interviewer that I bring in and so it’s like, hey, what broke you right? So that could be one specific moment or that could be, you know, multiple things that have happened in life, you know? But there’s usually this one thing that, you know, kind of where everything else kind of snowballed on top of. And then it’s like, why are you not dead yet? You know, like, why are you not dead today if you’ve been broken so much, why are you still here? And that’s usually that opportunity where you’re like, you know, I don’t know why I’m here, you know, but evidently God has a plan and I don’t know what it is yet or, you know, it’s like, no, God had a plan for my wife and I can tell you exactly what it is, right? You know, like for me that moment of I know part of my purpose is to share my story. You know that god has a story inside of me that I think it. You know it needs to be told, you know?
Jacob Barr :
So is the is the point of having this collage of stories recorded? Is it to provide encouragement to those who are going in a who are going through a similar circumstance or, you know, for example, the woman who is thinking about abortion and she has cancer. Is this story like meant to try and give her hope or just help her, you know, see how? Yeah, I guess how would you summarize someone seeing this video who might have a similar circumstance going on in their life?
Steventhen Holland :
Yeah, well, absolutely i think there’s some stories that are i mean, it hits direct, right? I’ll give you a real life example i was leading worship. This is we’re doing this on a Monday. I was leading worship yesterday on a Sunday at a church in this little small town in Alabama. And i had this guy come up to me after the service and I could tell he was kind of reluctant to come up to me. But he came up and finally and he said he’s like, man, I didn’t know that you’re the founder of broken not dead, right and he’s like you got stories on YouTube, right? And I’m like, yes Sir and he’s like and he started crying and he said, well this one man’s story and he mentioned his name and he’s like that’s my story. Like I like I was AI was a minister and my wife was unfaithful and you know that the church actually fired me, you know and he’s like and I felt so worthless right and purposeless and all these things but I heard this man’s story and I’m just telling you, man, it’s did something and I wound up watching all of them like all 22 of them that you have and like all the, you know, even though the other stories weren’t my story, there was just so much hope and you know, purpose that came and i’m crying by the time he’s done, ’cause I’m like that’s why we do this, right that that’s why. That’s why we have this platform. So I would say directly, yeah, if you’re, you know, if you’re somebody dealing with cancer or depression or whatever, but then there’s just some stories that it’s just universal and I think hope, you mentioned hope, I think that’s that keyword i mean, you know, whatever hope we can bring into somebody’s life i mean, you know, again by just sharing testimonies, I think there’s so much power in that we don’t tap into enough. And you know, my heart is too that, you know, I think again the platform is it’s OK to be broken, right. I think especially in the church, but I mean in the world for sure, but even church folk, you know, but it’s OK to be broken because broken, if broken, is not a death sentence. It’s just part of our story, right death is death. So I think that too I think has been and I and we’ve heard that from people that man, you just remind, you know this story just reminded me that it’s still worth going on and you know that God truly can work even in my mess, you know?
Jacob Barr :
Yeah and one of some of the values that my church holds or my church community holds, one of the values is authenticity. So just trying to be real more so than like having a veneer or a or a or a fake front trying to, you know, be authentic. And then another value that we hold is vulnerability. And you know by not trying to you know by essentially being able to be you know by sharing something that’s going on someone could judge you know judge that person who shares in that you know that shares that brokenness. And so I think there’s value in being vulnerable and authentic as that’s you know sort of a way of saying this is what’s really going on and that’s really hard to do and it’s very easy and tempting to not do those things And I feel like you’re yeah you’re describing those values that yeah seems like you’ve. Yeah, and a different for a basically coming up with the same result.
Steventhen Holland :
Well, absolutely and i see that like so we, you know our video production area that we have, we were in a partnership there was a gracious church that you know came alongside of us and said hey, we’ll donate 700 square feet just you know to have some space and we renovated it so we have a video production suite and when i sit behind kind of a curtain and I’m praying and listening and processing and then I’ll add some input if I feel like it’s needed but I try to stay out of the way and just pray and I think out of the 2024 stories that will air by the end of August. I think there’s been maybe three that didn’t break down in tears, you know, and cry and that was something, I’ll be honest with you, that I wasn’t. There’s this like you said, being vulnerable, you know, and almost fearful, you know, fearful, but being vulnerable to just go all in and share it all i mean there there’s some people that’s like, you know, have been speaking for a while and even you know has more of a national platform and they were like there’s some stuff I shared in this hour that I have, I’ve never shared before And there’s just healing, you know, that comes in that room and that’s something that I it might be the most important thing that’s happening, you know, in there because then that, you know, again we honor people’s stories we, you know, we check with them and make sure that they’re OK with what’s being sent out to the world and that kind of thing but just the healing that happens from being like you said vulnerable, you know to share their heart and there’s been people that have been afraid to share you know and it and it’s we’ve kind of encouraged them like hey listen but the world needs to hear this you know. And if you’re not completely comfortable with it then we won’t share parts of that story. You know. But yeah so but I think it’s just a beautiful thing. I think that’s how God meant for us to be. I think that can be in the church but even in like the pregnancy center right. That’s the beauty of listen you can come here and we’re going to love you with no judgment right. That you that you’re worth it your baby’s worth it we love you no matter what. I think the church, you know my heart for the churches and i it needs to be less of a Country Club for the put together in more of a hospital for the hurting, you know, and the sick. And I think that’s how it was always meant to be.
Jacob Barr :
Yeah, one of one of my, well, probably my favorite verse is James five sixteen which says therefore confess your sins to one another and pray for one another that you may be healed and then it goes on The prayer of a righteous person has great power as it is working and so essentially it talks, you know that first part talks about confessing sin to another person and then it talks about the prayer of a righteous person has a great impact. And so i think by being vulnerable and sharing these hard stories in the case of you know, in needing to be healed, I feel like that’s part of that, that’s part of the process based on, yeah James five sixteen And so healing is like the result of that experience.
Steventhen Holland :
Absolutely well, and I and you know and I and it’s been, it’s just now starting to kind of happen but you know I’ve even had like I said mentioned before briefly I, I’ve had some pregnancy centers you know reach out and say hey that that’s interesting what you’re doing. You know could we bring in you know like could we bring some clients that would just you know, we’ve been praying for a platform for them to share i don’t think that’s a beautiful thing you know, I think that we could broken not dead could offer that you know and because we’re getting into even like some sponsorship type of things with episodes and there’s another level of for a pregnancy center to have some marketing, right. If they if they sponsor that client story then there’s you know, there’s visibility for their donor platform. You know, so i see it as being, you know, again just looking at those things and trying to figure out how we can and that’s not only just for pregnancy centers but you know since we’re talking about pro-life world, you know, that’s that it’s a really cool thing you know that it’s a beautiful thing that I feel like we’ve been able to create.
Jacob Barr :
So besides asking someone about well what’s one of your what’s some of your favorite questions to ask someone who you’re interviewing about or you said you’re bringing in someone interview so, like, what are some of your favorite questions that get asked when someone’s being interviewed to share their story? What are some of the yeah, what are some things you can think of? And a good.
Steventhen Holland :
Question those standard things yeah, those standard things like I said, the two big ones are what broke you. Why are you not dead, you know, But then, but it’s just those pointed questions where, you know, that’s why I bring in an interviewer you know, she’s a journalist, so she’s used to doing this you know, I’ll bring her in and she’s sitting behind the camera. So they’re more having a. It’s conversational, which I think is beautiful. You know, it’s like you’re just telling her your story, you know, But she’ll ask things well, how did that make you feel? And it’s like, you know, like I’ve never really thought about like you’re getting all up in my feelings now right. I just wanted to share my story right but it but then there’s the that those moments where like you said like you kind of dig in a little bit you know to be you know like and I love you know if you were and a lot of times for myself like at the end I’ll be like OK so you know you’re you were dealing with that depression or you know there was a even have some people that have attempted suicide and those type of things. So like if you were looking in that camera and somebody watching this right now, you know what I’m saying like they’re right there where you were. What would you say to them, you know, to encourage them and i love that because that gives that person that I always say it like this, you can’t reach a broke if you ain’t been broke, right i’m from Tennessee so got to throw the eight in there. But you know nobody can reach them like they could And you know this video is powerful and it you know, and we don’t, we don’t know where it’s going to go. You know who’s going to view it? So I love those questions where it’s like, OK, this is a moment for you to speak life, to speak truth, to bring hope, you know, what would you say? You know, and I and i love those moments where we just give them a chance to minister, actually, you know, even outside of the story.
Jacob Barr :
Yeah i’m a I’m a big fan of recording stories where you’re essentially capturing that person’s story and how it interacts with Jesus or with God’s working through their lives. And I feel like stories like that need to be captured because otherwise how will they get shared or how will they get retold. And there’s a lot of value when it comes to just simply, you know, experiencing God and Jesus and then recording that story so that it can be passed on to someone else that so that someone else can find hope and encouragement and I think that’s huge well, for the stories that have truly, you know, Jesus weaved in.
Steventhen Holland :
Right but even the practical side too, you know, like, so how did you make it? You know, how did you overcome? And you know, not every story is the same and not everybody you know is going to deal with the same but still just giving some encouragement, like, well, this is kind of what I did, you know, maybe it’ll work for you know, it’s that kind of stuff, you know, like, man, like, you know, how did you find your faith? How did you come back to faith? You know, because there’s been stories where I lost it completely i wanted nothing to do with Jesus, nothing to do with the, you know, religion, you know, our relationship with cry, any of that stuff. Well, how did you find your way back you know, so just, you know, like you said, I mean, that’s just getting vulnerable, that’s getting real. And that’s really our heart for this you know, it’s and sharing like, you know, just real people, you know, I mean, I know we’re all real, but, you know, moms and dads and students and grandparents and you know what I’m saying like just stories from, you know, different races and different just that we can all somebody can relate to somebody you know.
Jacob Barr :
So when did you get started with broken? Was he was. I’m sorry, Not dead.
Steventhen Holland :
Broken not dead.
Jacob Barr :
And then when did you get started when it came to being like an event speaker and helping with the fundraising work.
Steventhen Holland :
That’s funny because it all happened really at the same time the same year, because I was a youth pastor for and worship leader on staff at churches for about 13 years that was my degree was in youth ministry. And then actually my adopted father got he was sick with Alzheimer’s and I spent a year with him, my wife and three kids we moved from Tampa, florida back to chattanooga tennessee, where I grew up and in the nearby and he lived about a year and 14 days. I wrote a book after he passed away about six months after he passed away I released that and I started working for a pregnancy Center for 3 and a half years. So that kind of. So that kind of opened my eyes to a little bit more of where my testimony, my story could be utilized. I was doing absence education in about 33 schools. I think we had about 12.000 thousand students that I would talk to in the public school well, actually all schools, Christian, public, private. And so in 2018 I had Ambassador Speakers Bureau in Franklin, tennessee pick me up as a national pro-life speaker, which was I worked for 3 and a half, years you know, trying to because most of the time speaking agencies bring you on because you know, you’re a high profile, you know, national celebrity or and best selling author and I wasn’t any of those, but I had a story to share. And i worked really hard for 3 and a half years to figure out, OK, how can I find a platform to share my story? And I just went after, you know, a website, videos, all those things, and they finally gave me an opportunity in 2000 January, the end of January, beginning of February 2018 Then I launched Broken, not Dead, March of 2018 I had somebody come and actually offer to pay for all of it. You know, there there’s a God, God’s hand on things and so, yeah, so the speaking thing started kind of alongside of broken, not dead and what I said, broken not dead kind of evolved from one man, right. Like Stevenson into wait a minute, broken not dead needs to be a platform not just for me, right to share my story. But you know you’re broken not dead. You know there’s more broken not dead people in the world. And so it’s more it’s less of a ministry and more of a movement, you know, I think so yeah so it all, it all happened right there in the same time frame. And honestly, what it was is my wife and I, we kind of, just, you know, had been praying for a lot for a while, couple years about just making space for God to move. And honestly, if it was sacrifice, you know, I stepped away from the only job that I had income at with the pregnancy center, which wasn’t a ton of money i mean, it was a blessing to have it, but I was traveling every weekend speaking, you know, even on Wednesday night speaking. I think the last year I did 75 events throughout the year on top of speaking five days a week in the schools, you know, just trying, you know, I would take anything and everything didn’t matter how much they paid me, you know, I just, I knew I needed to tell my story. So like I said, 2018 we launched out kind of in faith and said, God, I know you’re calling us to this. And you know, I went from 4 speaking engagements next year, 7 and 15 and 27 and over 30 this year wow so.
Jacob Barr :
Looking back at the very first time you gave your story at A at an event in front of an audience, what was that? What do you remember, recall from that first time being in front of people and sort of, yeah, sharing in large in front of an audience for the first time?
Steventhen Holland :
That’s a two-part and I’ll be quick I think.
Jacob Barr :
Take your time.
Steventhen Holland :
The people.
Jacob Barr :
Are driving while they listen to this, they’ll.
Steventhen Holland :
They’ll be driving.
Jacob Barr :
Commuting, we got time.
Steventhen Holland :
Yeah, the first time that I ever shared my story like you know after I had met my mom, my birth mom and it. So it wasn’t even a pro-life engagement. I actually was asked to speak at a Celebrate Recovery. So a recovery program, 12 step faith-based program. And you know, normally they bring people in to speak and it’s like you have to, you know, follow a certain protocol and all these things. And they said, no, you got freedom to share so I shared my story that night and this was probably about six years before I actually started sharing my story, you know, so this is about 2009 2010 I shared that night and I had a young African American woman she was probably about 26 I think she was. She had, she heard my story and she came up to me and she was just weeping, just crying for like a good two three, minutes couldn’t speak. And then she hugged me and she finally was able to tell me she’s like, when I was 15 years old, my mom forced me to have an abortion. And from the moment that I, you know, i allowed her to make that decision for me, you know, i immediately regretted it. And she said for the first time in 11 years, my chains have been broken and I’m sitting there like OK, I mean, it floored me. But then even after I had time to process, I was like, Lord, how could you take my story where I had a birth mom mentally challenged, raped by 5 men. She carried me homeless and chose life for me. How can you use that to break this woman’s chains? You know of guilt and shame because you would think that it would even pile more chains on, you know, like because again, she chose life and I didn’t. And when got when I was like, OK, Lord, I this is more powerful than I even imagined and if you’re going, if you will, give me a platform, I don’t care how big, how small, I’m going to share. That was kind of the deal I made with the Lord. Then it was like 6 years later before I actually started walking. You know, i wrote my book and started walking in that, you know, it took some time because I was so like church, you know, like minister, which I still am a minister but I was so church focused that I didn’t even realize that I had a voice or a platform outside of that does that make sense? Like I’m saying, like with the pro-life world, I was pro-life but I didn’t know that my story mattered.
Jacob Barr :
Yeah.
Steventhen Holland :
In that world, does today.
Jacob Barr :
Yeah, sometimes you just got to, well, sometimes, yeah, layers, you know, you figure things out as you go and but your story definitely has a huge impact in the pro-life world and in the Christian sphere, which is something very often one in the same.
Steventhen Holland :
So God, so God that small to a lot of people, small moment there was probably only five six people in the room, you know, and I was nervous as all get out, but I shared it and then I saw God work, even though I probably stumbled all over my words and it wasn’t put together. And then, like I said, it gave me a little confidence, right, that God’s going to use this. And I got to keep sharing. But again, it took six years before, you know, I wrote my book and the book came out and I started sharing mostly in churches and things like that i didn’t really have a lot of pro-life engagements, you know, on my own. I had done, I think, 3 fundraising events before I got picked up by the National Speaking Agency. And then after that, you know, we started, it started rolling. It was just kind of like, you know recommendations and people and I hear things like and I am please hear my heart not a big head. Conceited, humble just so thankful. But what I hear is like you’re the best speaker we’ve ever had. You know, like just stuff like that warms my heart because I know there’s so many, so much, you know, better speakers than me trust me i know that. But just how, you know, like you said, being vulnerable, being faithful and obedient to just show up and share and how God uses that to touch lives and impact lives. And then again, like just the raising money, you know, I’m hearing like, man, this is the most money we’ve ever raised, you know, at our banquet and I’m like.
Jacob Barr :
Lord.
Steventhen Holland :
You know, I’m just thankful, man you know what I’m saying? I just sit back and awe of how good God is and how faithful. And I think back to 2009 you know, And I said, Lord, if you’ll give me a platform, if you just give me a platform, I’ll share. And, you know, it’s just crazy. You know, I’m having, i’m having to, I’m not a person that likes to say no to ministry. And I’m having to start saying no to ministry to make room so I can actually see my family. You know, ’cause I’m traveling, I’m traveling so much now. You know, I’ll have a couple events in the same week, and sometimes I’m gone for two 2, and a half weeks before I get to see my wife and kids and so I’m we’re having to strategically like plan our life around my speaking schedule, you know, which is just new for us. I mean, but I have a very supportive wife that loves me and she knows that what God’s called me to, and she’s in agreement with that. She supports me 100 % or I wouldn’t be going. And of course we have conversations with my girls all the time like you know daddy loves you know and but you know what God’s called, you know called me to and we keep communication open you know with that. You know when they’re. It breaks my heart and I know we’re kind i kind of went in left field here but Oh no, this is good. But I, you know my youngest, I have a 14 year old a 12 year old and a nine year old they’re all girls all daughters isabella’s the oldest eliana and Cadence. And I’ll tell you what broke my heart man if about a month ago, I’d come in from a longer stretch and I get ready to leave i’m pulling out going down the road and my 9 year old’s running across the yard waving at Dad, you know, waving at me, literally running after my car. And I man, I just, I lost it. I was like, you know, Lord, I’m so thankful I get to do what I get to do, but you know, I’d rather be home with my kids sometimes you know too but I’ve got, I’m still going to be faithful, you know and he gave that he gives that time back, you know. So anyways you said get vulnerable and real so.
Jacob Barr :
Yeah, you live in the example that’s good. All right i’m going to throw you a new, a new angle, a new direction of question.
Steventhen Holland :
So what was the last?
Jacob Barr :
Passage that you recall in the Bible that you either read or heard from a sermon or maybe that you even may have preached but what’s the last passage you recall?
Steventhen Holland :
Second Corinthians four eight and nine. That’s the that’s the passage that we find you know, I may be i’m paraphrasing, but I may be hard pressed on every side, you know, persecuted but not abandoned, struck down but not destroyed. It’s just, I mean powerful word and but I think even like before go ahead, sorry.
Jacob Barr :
What? How does that passage, how does that passage impact you and what you’re going through in life right now?
Steventhen Holland :
Oh, man. You know, I mean, I even think about like just the craziness that we’re experiencing, you know, in the pro-life world right now, you know, Roe V Wade i mean, I know it’s going to come up and, you know, I just all these things that, OK, it’s going to be hard pressed on every side but you know what? Persecuted, not abandoned, struck down, but not destroyed. You know that they’re still it’s still worth the fight. You know, I think that’s kind of my mantra right now that no matter how bad life may seem or, you know, I’m trying to pull up that scripture for you since you put me on the.
Jacob Barr :
Spot oh yeah, pull it up take your time.
Steventhen Holland :
But you know it’s just, I think that it’s a battle cry right? That no matter how tough life gets it’s still, it’s still worth it, man and he’s got me, you know, personally got me but yeah, we are pressed on every side by troubles but we are not crushed we are perplexed but not driven to despair. We are haunted down but never abandoned by God. We get knocked down, but we are not destroyed. And I think, you know, I can look back at my own i mean my life like God never abandoned me, you know, He’s never forsaken me. I mean, yeah, I’ve been broke, but I’m not dead yet. You know, I could. But I’ll tell you one thing though, that I mean, you’re going to get me preaching now, but that’s good sometimes you know, you ask me that favor. I mean, that’s that scripture that pops out but sometimes, you know that that’s kind of a, you know, one that a lot of people know. But five through 7 love and I kind of like just kind of refound it. But it says you see.
Jacob Barr :
First Corinthians, what was it again?
Steventhen Holland :
It’s a Second Corinthians, second Corinthians 4 And then so verses 5 through 9. You know, I read eight and, nine but five, says you see, we do not go around preaching about ourselves. We preach that Jesus Christ is Lord and we ourselves are your servants. For Jesus sake. For God, who said, let there be light in the darkness, has made that light shine in our hearts so we could know the glory of God that it is seen in the face of Jesus Christ in verse seven we know or we now have this light shining in our hearts. But we ourselves are like fragile clay jars containing this great treasure. This makes it clear that our great power is from God and not ourselves. You know, And that’s just a reminder, man, that we, you know, that’s where I, you know, that’s where my power comes from and I know that. And I, you know, when I grace the stage, when I go to lead worship, I’m going to fumble, I’m going to, you know, stumble i’m going to forget words i’m going to play the wrong lyrics. But it’s not for my glory it’s for his alone, you know, and it’s not my power, but his power. And I and I think for me, I’ve just seen that so evident and I think some of that, like running a nonprofit, like, man, you talk about stretching faith. You know, whenever I’m trying to feed my family on donor support and you know, I mean, we’ve been there. You know, we, there was a lot of sacrifice, especially early on. You know, like I said, 2018 I gave up income and, you know, just chasing after what God’s called me to do i’ve had pastors look at me and tell me I was crazy and they get mad at me because they’ve offered me jobs, you know, And I wouldn’t take the job because it’s not what God called me to do and he wouldn’t give me the OK to take it even though it would been really comfortable to take it. So anyways, man that just means a lot to me and I use a lot of times when I speak it’s something especially the last year or two. Have you ever heard of Kintsugi?
Jacob Barr :
No.
Steventhen Holland :
It’s KINTSUGI and that’s the Japanese art form of mending broken pottery. Have you seen where they actually put the gold like a bowl or a plate they.
Jacob Barr :
Oh.
Steventhen Holland :
Ok like the cracks are repaired with gold. Have you, you’ve kind of seen some pictures maybe of that?
Jacob Barr :
Sounds familiar. And I But I can, and I can imagine, yeah, feeling the cracks with something precious that seems like I can imagine what people would look like.
Steventhen Holland :
Well, when you think about that, and I’m reading the scripture, you know, and I and I kind of that’s where I was with the scripture was let there be light in the darkness, right as we have made this light shine in our hearts and it goes on to verse seven, it says we ourselves are like fragile clay can jars containing this great treasure. And that Japanese art form is they don’t throw away any of the broken pieces they pick them all up. They mend them back it has to be a master Potter too it has to be somebody that’s really gifted in, you know, this art form and they mend it all back together with precious they take a lacquer, a glue, and they mix gold or platinum or silver in there and they repair it. So the cracks are not hidden, They’re actually illuminated. So the object can still be used after it’s been restored. It’s actually worth more than it was in its original state. And then I think my favorite one is when you shine light on that object now, it literally reflects the light. And you know, when I think about that is because of his power in US and he uses our brokenness in a lot and a lot of our lives to reveal his light. You know, to say I’m not going to hide my scars and hide my brokenness. I’m going to share it with the world to see and that’s what I do now i’m from the country i hope I don’t offend anybody with this, but my crap has become my fertilizer, you know what I’m saying? So you know, it may not have been great walking through it wasn’t fun at times, but I’ve seen God use it, you know, to restore and bring hope and the beautiful thing is like through our platform and broken, not dead we’re getting to see that, you know, fleshed out and shared from other people, too.
Jacob Barr :
There’s a there’s a song at my church i think someone at my church might have written it and it goes, one of the lyrics goes where I am weak, God is strong or maybe. I’m not sure if our church wrote it or someone else wrote it, but I’ll put that at the end of this podcast is like the outro music.
Steventhen Holland :
Yeah.
Jacob Barr :
And essentially the whole, the song essentially is like, you know, saying that even where you’re broken, yeah, you know, God is completely strong in that area even though you’re, you know, missing in that area.
Steventhen Holland :
Well, I think that’s the beauty, that’s the, that’s the beauty of that passage, right that it this makes it clear that our great power is from God, not from us, not from us. You know, apart from him, you know we are weak apart from him, he’s the one that gives the power. And then we reverse eight and nine you know, we are hard pressed on every side, but, you know, not crushed, persecuted, not abandoned, struck down, but not destroyed because of his power right. So that’ll that’ll preach.
Jacob Barr :
When you when you found out what God wanted you to do, what was your experience to get to that point of knowing what God wanted you to do like, how did you arrive at knowing that?
Steventhen Holland :
I think you’re I mean specifically to like the speaking like sharing my story or?
Jacob Barr :
Like, did you, when it came to like what God wanted you to do, did you know, was it like a series of, like, you know, small doors opening in order to open up bigger doors or was it more of like praying and, you know, God just answering the prayer in some way how did you go about knowing what God wanted you to do for your life?
Steventhen Holland :
Well, I think, you know, I mentioned a little earlier that, you know, my wife and I had really kind of been praying together, you know, and separately for a couple years, you know, she was praying for an RV to be provided for us to travel the country and do my prayer wasn’t that I I’ve got a wife and three girls i was like I don’t know if I want to be stuck in a you know she was looking at buses that we can convert you know and I’m like I love you all but you know so anyways but the Lord actually a funny thing he provided a 40 foot RV for us in 2018 right Whenever the speaking agency picked me up and the nonprofit became a reality. So anyways, he must listen to her better than me but anyways, for two years and then we prayed about and really it was like we started out, it was me, my wife and my kids, you know, really, you know, me sharing my testimony and leading worship but my daughters actually lead worship with me at times. You know, they’re musically inclined they play piano and sing and sing harmonies and stuff so we were kind of doing this family, really a missional family like evangelist. And but then the speaking agency picked me up, which they had done that already but I started getting more engagements, you know, to speak and for me to make time for that, I had to be near an airport. You know, it’d be hard to, you know, leave my family in Colorado and for me to fly somewhere to speak and they’re stuck there by themselves you know what I’m saying like, so it just kind of, you know, it evolved And you know, the national speaking platform was never really something that was on my radar, to be honest with you know, that wasn’t where. But I think you know, well, any, I mean a lesson in life for anybody, but especially when you’re doing things for the Lord is to be flexible, you know, to be open to his leading and not our own and I think sometimes it’s like, you know, God, hey, go here, OK, we go there. God says, OK, i’m kind of finished with that season we need to go over here. Right so that’s kind of where we’re at and I think it’s the same thing with broken not dead with the ministry. What I thought it was going to be at the beginning was not what it is today, you know, because again like what’s that old saying i’m going to mess it up, but, you know, basically find where God is working and go, you know, like go there, you know, instead of, I think when we try to do it on my own, it’s when I’m falling flat on my face, you know, It’s just, I’ve seen God be too faithful to not trusting, you know?
Jacob Barr :
And it does feel like when it comes to like the Christian sphere of where of where God works, I feel like the pro-life you know, interfere within that Christian sphere. God is working just all the time and there’s so many fingerprints and stories of him just moving that forward and protecting people and providing that it’s just like it’s almost like it’s like the bullseye of his will, like the middle of his will with what he protects and blesses it’s just so full of good grace and.
Steventhen Holland :
Well, and just being and being real, man. I mean you know my wife, I mean it you know it was a little bit of a struggle like with us like not our marriage falling apart or anything like that but you know when we again 2018 when we she prayed for an RV and we got this 40 foot RV and you know we’re going to be traveling the country and doing ministry and going from place to place and you know, and that and that happened for a little while and then it was like OK, well the speaking thing is really starting to pick up and you know we had to have a sit down conversation, you know my wife and I and be like OK, you know, if I do this, you know if we get chased, you know, go down that road then things are going to change a little bit. Are you OK with that You know and do I need to be doing this And we had to get on our knees, you know, and pray, you know, ask the Lord like you know is this the door you’re opening that we need to run through. And you know, and I did and again I told you before she’s 100 % behind me and faithful and but she also she puts me in my place sometimes like we just got back from a three day trip you know to a little like a lake lodge, you know, that had a pool and all. And she’s like you’re leaving your phone at home. You’re cutting off that, you know, because I mean i’m a worker man and you know, and I don’t have any employees right now from a nonprofit i need to change that but we’re in a place where that’s about to happen but I, you know, I do a lot of it by myself so it’s like I feel like I have to answer that text or I have to get that email or you know what I’m saying. So it’s the balance, you know, finding balance there and I’m not the best at it, but God’s brought me a helpmate. You know, long that she’s more of about rest and her love language is time. You know, like your kids need more of your time i need more of your time, so you got to slow down. So anyway.
Jacob Barr :
Well, I got one more question. When God answered your primarily your wife’s prayer about an RV. When you look back at that time, how does that make you feel or how do you reflect on that answered prayer and have that experience?
Steventhen Holland :
Oh, I think hands down that if God’s in it, you know what I’m saying? I mean, don’t tell me he can’t. Don’t tell me he can’t provide. Don’t tell me he won’t do it. You know, I do i do believe it’s got to be in his will, you know and I think also too, it’s the fervent prayers and you know, believing that God’s going to do it, you know, I truly believe that my wife, she meant what she prayed for, you know, and.
Jacob Barr :
Did you find confidence and going on that, you know, on that RV trip and RV time because of the answered prayer, like what was your experience when it came to like your desire and confidence, maybe switching from, I’m not sure to yeah, this is what God has called us to do.
Steventhen Holland :
Absolutely i mean I would even say even up till now you know it’s been I don’t know it’s just crazy to me i have people in my life today that I mean I’ve got a couple people that actually have made a career change you know, which is crazy to me because they looked at like what I you know what we did as a family what I you know the steps that I took like man you walked away from your only like you’re only stable income and you know went out on the road and like I knew you back then and here you are today you know running you know you got this nonprofit and you’re speaking and to me it’s like I haven’t arrived by any means but I but i have seen God work you know miraculously. And I think it really you know because i guess it’s confidence that I it’s affirmation that’s the word it’s affirmation that I was doing i’ve done exactly, hopefully, what God has called me to do, you know, And sometimes it was kicking and screaming and asking him why. And Lord is this i’ve almost quit 20 times with speaking and you’re running a nonprofit, but you know, something inside of me and you know, said no, but he’s been so faithful, you know, so why are you afraid now when you’ve seen him work, You know, provide an RV, pick speaking agency, pick you up somebody paid for your nonprofit. We were given a car one time, you know, one time because we were needing it. We had a vehicle breakdown last summer and I had to be, you know, at 4 summer camps and we needed, you know, we had to rent a vehicle for a while but then God, God’s people showed up and we were able to pay cash for, you know, don’t you know, Again, I think it’s just seeing the faithfulness of God and watching him work and then like you said, man, that you get, you get spiritual confidence from that, you know, knowing that God, he’s, I got you and I think didn’t I think we read that right in that actually what we did right in verse in verse nine sorry i just had this thought that said through suffering our bodies continue to share in the death of Christ no, that’s not it sorry let’s.
Jacob Barr :
See the second Corinthians was it?
Steventhen Holland :
It’s four. It’s 4 verse nine yeah, we are haunted down, but never abandoned by God. We get knocked down, but we are not destroyed but I think it’s that abandoned part. I love that word that you know God’s never going to abandon you know and it may not look exactly what you want it to look like, but God’s always got you, and He’s always got your best interests at heart.
Jacob Barr :
Yeah, god is faithful and yeah, faith and he’s there even, you know, in the hard times and all the times.
Steventhen Holland :
Yeah And I’ll tell you know, my wife didn’t always see what you know, see what I saw. You know, I’m more the visionary you know, kind of looking 10 years down the road, you know, and again, trusting God like right from the past. And I had to have some people in my life i’m this is some practical stuff. I, you know, and I didn’t do this alone. You know what I’m saying like I had some, you know, some faithful people in my life that kind of had to give me a spiritual kick in the rear end, you know, like would you please stop complaining about, you know, lack of donor support coming in or whatever he’s like have you not, did you not remember what the Lord did for you know, back in 2018 You know what I’m saying like the that have been with me for a little while. It’s kind of we need that accountability we need that community, you know, brothers and sisters in Christ to set to come alongside and kind of like, you know, I think about Moses, you know, part in the Red Sea, like he had to have some people hold his arms up, you know, And I and I’m thankful for people in my life that have done that. And I’ve even I’ve even had people, you know, at pregnancy center fundraisers or something, you know, just come up to me and say please don’t ever stop. You know that they’ve encouraged me to keep going. You know, affirm me in that.
Jacob Barr :
So, yeah so yesterday at my church, they were, we were talking about faithfulness. And one of the comments after church was that God is he essentially provides the right time. You know, he doesn’t show up. You know, like they’re crossing at the Red Sea he didn’t cross the Red Sea. You know, a day before they got there, they waited, you know, it was at the right time it wasn’t.
Steventhen Holland :
Usually the eleventh hour.
Jacob Barr :
It’s right it’s right when you need it yeah and it’s not that and then and part of, you know, having faith is being there when it happens more so than it being done beforehand like, you know, if every if everyone had an extra million dollars in the bank, you know what kind of faithfulness would you need?
Steventhen Holland :
Right you.
Jacob Barr :
Know it would just rely on the money and but the idea is that if you know when you’re when you’re when times are tight and you know you need a car and you can’t get your old car fixed. I mean depending on god can provide when you need it it’s a that’s sort of the beauty of yeah, it’s I don’t know, I feel like God shows up at the right time.
Steventhen Holland :
Well, my wife has said this for like actually a couple years now. You know, it’s like when we get that little extra money or, you know, we’ve sold a car or something, you know, like it’s just like, oh man, you know, we’re rich and not really, but, you know, but she’s like, but what do we need it for you know it’s she’s like she really refers to it from manna, from heaven. You know, it’s like OK guys provided this mana so OK What Car is going to break now You know. So it’s like but that’s just kind of how it you know how it’s been for us it’s kind of we laugh about it because it’s like OK we’ve got this. But we know it’s not necessarily for extra you know it it’s provided for something. You know whatever that may be and it might just be clothes for my kids you know or something that we didn’t know we were going to need and but I but I love that you know like mana you know it in the promised land right like that manna that God provided but they got they got tired of it and you know they would have just held out if they would have just held out just a little longer you know they were right there at the promised land but you know they started complaining and it and IA little extra thing but it’s just being content you know like not that you stopped going but just being thankful in the moment you know for what God has provided even though you may desire more it’s just learning to just be in his presence and just be thankful you know for what he’s and I think that’s been that’s been a lesson I i’m so honored that i feel like I understand a little more now you know it’s OK to desire things and want things but don’t let that you know also be faithful or be thankful for what you have now you know.
Jacob Barr :
Yeah, well, I really appreciate your time and I really appreciate this chance to talk to you and hear your story. Would you say a prayer as we wrap things up and maybe include just something about, you know, the pro-life and Christian audiences listening to find, you know, to think of the manna that God’s giving us and to not get tired of it and to not store it, but just to enjoy it as God provides in a faithful way?
Steventhen Holland :
Yeah, I would love to. Dear Heavenly follower, I thank you so much for this day god, I thank you literally for the day that I think sometimes we get caught up so much in the busy and the hustle of life that we forget to just stop and say thank you. So God, I thank you for anybody that may be on listening to this with a podcast or watching God there there’s been some hope we talked about that word today that somebody can find in this moment whatever it may be. Just thank you for guiding our conversation may have may have went some places that we didn’t even see it happening but God, i thank you for that and I and truly hope that there’s restoration and hope that has been come from this platform. But I also specifically pray for the pro-life movement. God that we don’t grow weary that we don’t grow tired that you know as this verse in second Corinthians 4 you know eight and nine that yes we are hard pressed and yes you know persecuted in a lot of ways but God, we you know we don’t give up because we know that you’ve got us. That you don’t abandoned us that you don’t forsake us. So God, for anybody that needs that today God, please receive it god, I pray they receive it. And it literally gives them a renewed vision and a renewed restore the fight within them to say that it’s still worth the fight, even no matter how dark it gets. And we’re going to keep fighting because life is worth fighting for and that’s what we’re called to do. God, thank you for my life thank you for the opportunity that I have just to share my story thank you that I have a story. God, i want to say thank you for my mom, my hero. That even despite her mental lack of mental capabilities, she knew that life was worth fighting for. And God, i just love you. And I thank you. Yeah, I you’re just good. You’re so good. And we love you and we praise you in your precious name amen.
Jacob Barr :
Amen awesome well I really appreciate your time Steven Thin this was been, this has been amazing to hear your story and just to see how God’s working through you and how you’re, yeah, being part of the broken team, doing good things.
Steventhen Holland :
Well, like I said, I’m broken but I’m thankful I’m not dead yet so until I’m until I’m gone, I’m going to keep, you know, doing what I can, doing what I see.
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